Prior Posts

I just looked at some of my prior postings. I wish I didn't get into politics so much. I suppose it still expresses a part of my past so oh well. I don't know that I agree with myself in most of that now. Oh well.

Organizations

I got this rumination on organizations from Ed Chinn today:

"Part of what makes organizations unnatural is that they assume (and plan for) perpetuity. No living thing lives forever on the earth. That’s why the American Cancer Society is something of a perversion…the last thing it wants is a cure for cancer. Yet, some organizations – Salvation Army, Red Cross, Hospice – just seem to roll on from age to age. But, they all seem to have an enduring and straight-ahead quality. They don’t depend on manipulation or deception. They provide solid services and seem to exist for those services. It’s like God gives them long life because of the depth of their care.

"Regarding churches, I don’t think local churches are necessarily supposed to endure permanently."

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I'm such a posessive individual. I think we all are. When I have something I don't want to lose it, I want it to be mine. Think of all the crazy things that people collect. They sit there behind glass, never to be touched.

Maybe it's why people own birds. We had a bird once and it always seemed unnatural to me. The most beautiful thing about birds is that they can fly. Watching a bird hover on the breeze is awe-inspiring. They just play in the wind, jump off buildings and swoop. Wouldn't it be cool to swoop? But there the bird sits, on a perch in a cage. It flaps it's wings once in a while but it's in protest, not in flight. It just never seemed right to me. I guess we do that with the Holy Spirit too. Or at least we wish we could.

Sermon or Seminar?

I've heard a lot of sermons in my life. I was raised Catholic and I remember my brother and I timing the priest with our new watches. I think 9 minutes was the longest one back then. But I've been in Protestant churches since I was 18 so now it's more like the 20-30 minute range.

I was talking to a friend this morning who referred to most sermons as "seminars". I like the term I think. Most sermons today really are more like seminars. Here's the difference as I see it.

A sermon ought to draw me closer to Christ. It will highlight His majesty and wonder. Seminars draw me closer to myself. They focus my attention on "me" in order to fix "me" and work on "me", "my" problems.

A seminar will be rather topical, ie. "How to...", "Five Ways You Can...", "Maximizing Jesus' Plan For...", "Three Ways to a Better...". But a sermon will be Biblical. It's not that a seminar won't use the Bible but it's more used to support a particular viewpoint rather than to illuminate a dark area of my life. A sermon draws out the Biblical text into my life. It may touch on various topics but the essential purpose is to bring me to Christ through the Gospel. If the Gospel is for anyone, it's for Christians and I, more than anyone I know, need to be reminded of it's power.

A sermon shows me my need for transformation. A seminar will only show me the importance of activity. It's not that activity is bad, but in itself activity cannot transform a life. Transformation happens from the inside, activity is only external.

So, a seminar will focus on systems. "If you put this or that system into place, your life will be enhanced." This works for a time but has no eternal power. A sermon focuses on heart matters.

Because a seminar has no real power, it must by nature attempt to make me more independent. If I incorporate all it's "wisdom points" into my life, I will have less need to rely on others. It serves most churches well I think if they can attract those who are good at putting things into practice. Not only does it decrease the member's dependence on the institution, it also enables them to grow their volunteer base and the institution as a whole. But a sermon will highlight the power of the Gospel through reminding me of my DEPENDENCY. Now that's a dirty word alright! But I am utterly dependent on Christ. My sin is great. My need is great. I need the balm He alone offers. I need the Gospel. A seminar leaves me needy and says "get it together man!" while a sermon offers help through the power of the Gospel that says "you can't do it, so Christ is here and He is for you."

A sermon will tend to help me see others as an end while a seminar will use others as a means. I think Reinhold Neihbur was the first one who said that we should see others as ends, not means. They are not a tool to get what we want. They are not "in our way", they are not there to be manipulated so that I can have a better life. People are ends in themselves. They are God's children, His beloved, His creation. People are made in the image of God. Even though we all know that we are not all that we should be and we want to change, we cannot see others as a means to our own change. And we cannot demand that they change on our timetable. God is making and molding them into what He wants.

Finally, a seminar must always bring me to the Law. It must always tell me that there is more to do. No matter how many hours I volunteer or how many meetings I am committed to, there will always be more I can and should do. A seminar always demands this. I may have the "5 steps to a good marriage" down cold, but next week I'll learn that there are "10 things a father must do" it's endless. It leads to legalism because it is legalism. But the Gospel frees me because all the "must", "should", etc, is completed at the cross. It transforms my heart so that I begin to ask "What can I do to please my Lord?"

I'm reading "Blue Like Jazz" and in it the author says "When you love someone you derive pleasure from their pleasure, you want to please them." That's the Gospel. Everything else rings hollow.

Meandering Heart

I'm feeling rather lost, alone. No, not alone but lonely.

I'm filled with this intense love for my daughters and for my wife. But it's not enjoyable. It's frightening. On my way to the office this morning I was looking at the mountains. They are beautiful. I'm blessed to live here. It was a weird morning, foggy in parts with the sun hitting a few hillsides. Almost like a dream. Thinking about how beautiful it is here and how blessed I am to be here wasn't comforting because no matter how beautiful a place is we are all going to die one day. I could live anywhere in the world and it wouldn't change that fact.

So the intense love for my family isn't comforting either. I loved spending time with them this weekend. We camped one night. It rained hard the next night and I was sitting at the campfire in the rain with Megan and Noelle. Jen was preping the veggies and chicken for the fire. My little girls seemed so fragile there. Not like they would break but like it was somehow my deep responsibility to make sure they were enjoying the time. I kept looking at them, smiling in the rain, their little ponchos covering all but their faces. It was miserable and they were loving it. It was crazy. It made my heart ache.

I wanted to climb inside their brains and know what they were thinking and feeling. And I wanted them to know what I was thinking and feeling. But we just sat there together and enjoyed the rain and the fire. Then the rain put out the fire so we couldn't cook. It ran through our tent and soaked all our stuff so we had to leave. When we got back home the girls were exhausted so we didn't cook smores in the fireplace like we said. We all went to sleep. The next morning both girls asked if we could go camping again. It made my heart ache and I said "Yes!"

I feel so responsible it's frightening. I want so bad for my kids to be safe, to feel loved, to have a good childhood, and to learn to love God. And at the same time I realize that they just want time with me, even if it's cold, in the rain and hungry on a ruined camping trip. That's a pretty scary realization man! I wonder if God has thoughts like that?